The day the war began

The day the war began

Seasons framed in reflection
Of my bedroom window view
In the mirror
I see me in all my bedding
Hair awry, face unkempt
Illuminated by the backdrop
Of the cherry tree
Telling me how long 
I’ve been sitting here
Since the day the war began
Lying wounded and shell-shocked
Months ago on my pillow
Craning my neck hesitantly
To peer out at the cherry picking
Birds up high buried in leaves
Listening to little voices squeal
Mouths filled with red juices
Delighting eating low hanging fruit.
More recently sitting strong, erect
Arms opening wide the curtains
To feast my eyes 
On the kaleidoscope 
Of fiery leaves still attached
And glowing in the light
As the sun hurriedly sets.
The coolness of the window
View icy grey branches 
Dew upon the buds 
That wait in vain for the frozen
Months to pass.
Teased endlessly by a
Weak winter sun bare lee
Shining on their old
And twisted frame
I feel much the same.
Old inside but 
Growing wise to not
Allow the inevitable
Changing seasons to
Dominate my own
Mind’s window view
Instead, I rely upon You.
To fight my battles with the
Endless foes apply the balm 
to shrapnel woes
Batten down the mind’s 
Battle cry and send the 
Warning salvo’s high.
Relent, relent, face me till
All life is spent.

Fallout Shelter

Image

Caught a glimpse of your soul

And crawled inside
A safe place to hide
Kept fed, warm and dry
Loved and faithful abide
Picked up out of the rain
Time and again
Cocooned from outside
Another lost one to find
Where comforts are few
Instead, I’d always find you.
Inside I heard your heart beating
The words repeating
Both begging that old ways
Be dead and gone
We felt nothing wrong.

Pieced together

It was as if a happier place existed

Geographically removed
From the seaborne blues
That swept our lives
And loved ones away
There is no respite from events
They carried on living and breathing
In our minds reenacted, even resolved
In our dreams..
Words such as ‘trigger’ held
Different meanings here
In this broken state they became one
But individually, completely undone
It is a necessary drawl to share
Whatever their minds have prepared
In the week since they last met
Whether triumph or despair
Friendships quickly tarnish
Like a silver teapot from the burden
Of incessant hospitality –
They could no longer see themselves
In the shine of each other’s eyes.
The warmth of the tea turns bitter cold
On their lips after a long-winded session
Of one-upmanship.

Hear

Image

Here I am saying these words to you in case I die soon

Here I am saying these words to you
Here I am saying
Here I am
Hear
I Am
Here I am / not knowing / who / I would be / without him
Without him / I would be / who? / Not knowing, / am I here?

Room for Friends

It just occurred to me
When I resurrected
The dead talk topic
You said ok..
I have no clue
What to say.

We both know this –
All the days past
Are covered in grace.
But if you had
Something to say
I would hear you
To your face

I’ve only had a handful
Of friendships last for years
Few of these are true brothers
The handful are held
In an open hand
In case they wanted to leave.

But I’ll set about trying
To kick every elephant
Out of here.
Because there’s no more
Room for friends.

I AM..

I AM Silent

But always listening in

waiting for any words

whether or not they rhyme..

I AM Walking

It’s the most I can do

lying in gentle wait

for You, we walk in two’s

I AM Patient

not knowing what to ask

for Fear it won’t be granted

Because the first will be the last

Love is a Battlefield

A word collage of quotes from my reading today…

“Blessed be the man who took notice of me

Relative, Guardian, Redeemer of my family

Removed his sandal as a vow

to renew her life.”*

“We don’t talk much but I believe

we have a more complete communion

with one another than even lovers have.

We are two minute sparks of life

what does he know of I or I of him?

Formerly we should not have

A single thought in common

now we sit with a goose between us

and feel in unison

are so intimate

that we do not even speak.”**

*The Book of Ruth- NRSV Bible

**”All Quiet on the Western Front” by Erich Maria Remarque, p.85. (HEB London, 1986)

Natural Born

Thrills, pills and highball spills
Tumbler emptied, hip flask chilled
Coney island, a laced wafer more
To take the edge off life, numb the core
Wheelers clad in their leathers
Dealers caught us by the tether
To market to market to buy the next ride
On struggle street bodies walk, dead inside
Shake it off, senseless these memories old
Surrounded by living, breathing trees, dreaming beings
Self-satisfaction at old tales retold
The evidence and consequence faded, unseen
The natural born tripper who shunned chemical highs
Prescribed a long life course of pain relief
The deepest ease comes from our loves inside reside
Protects from the whirlpool down, buoyed by treats

Seems the things that make us happy, haven’t changed much since we were in nappies – love food, stimulation, mother nature’s inspiration – rap lyrics to ‘The Favourite’ (author unknown)